Thugasarus Part 2

EDIT: It has come to my attention that this is not a tyrannosaurus. But does that matter? Look at its shades. So shady.

Thugasaurus

Considerably attractive innocent bystander female Janie (13ish) weighing under 100lbs and can barely do a push-up, walks into alone into a dark, deserted alleyway into the bad part of town at midnight completely defenseless and unarmed save for a giant wad of 100 dollar bills.
A thug hopped out of the shadows and cornered Janie.
A mixture of utter surprise and fear cursed Janie. A mugger! How unexpected, Janie did not see this coming. "Eeeek," she cried. "Will someone save me from this shocking and out-of-the-blue turn of events?"
Another thug hopped out of the shadows, bigger and stronger than the previous.
"Well this does not improve my situation at all," Janie complained.
Yet another thug hopped out of the shadows. Too many thugs in one area! The thugs began to fight each other over who will mug Janie.
One last thug hopped out of the shadows. He transformed into a tyrannosaurus four-legged dinosaur thing brontosaurus, and ate the other thugs.
"Huzzah! The process of evolution has saved me! Thank you survival of the fittest!" Janie exclaimed. She hopped onto the dinosaur, shouting "Come Thugasarus! We will rule this town!"
Janie and Thugasaurus, now best friends for life <3 ran into town destroying everything.

Story Archive Added!

Whoooooooo I finally did something.

Sometimes when I post my random junk here, I might decide to polish up the story. So that it's almost like an actual story. I'll keep all my better stories under Story Archive page. Yay for organization! I'll upload through Google Docs because of bias and because it's easier to edit. I included a word count for those tl;dr people. Aren't I so considerate? Of course, you wouldn't be here if you were a tl;dr type.

Meanwhile, I'll keep posting junk posts here.

Bed Time Story!

I should probably do these posts BEFORE I get sleepy.

Tomorrow though, I'll probably do something. Make a list of my stories I want to share I guess. I'll upload them through Google Docs because I'm lazy, and it's easier to edit things on Google Docs than on Blogssssssssssszzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Here's a short bed time story:

The moon felt extremely sleepy one day. And whoop-de-doo, it fell asleep. Fell. Plummeted. Sank. Into the ocean.
Glub glub glub, but the moon kind of couldn't swim. Lack of limbs I guess.
The animals in the ocean tried to help the moon. But omigod the moon was too heavy, who knew.
You know, the moon couldn't even fit in the ocean. Most of the moon was perfectly fine. Except for the part where the moon used to breathe. It wouldn't drown if it didn't decide to fall face first into the ocean.

Moral of the story!
Think about your actions ahead of time. Don't drown yourself face first. And when you encounter a problem such as this, man up, and grow a pair

OF LIMBS.

Yeeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh

Guess Who Doesn't Have an A in Math?

Math final destroyed me. Must find green mushroom.

I feel like procrastinating.

Naaahhhhh

Aaahhhh I have to finish by today!

Oh boy oh boy, finals! I liked them Freshmen year. I didn't have to study, and the school days were shorter. Awesomeness.

In other news, I love Chrome.

Paniiiiic!

Only tonight and tomorrow left to study for finals! Not ready! Exclamation point!

CAPS LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCK

Dear Internet Diary

So I actually studied today! I feel so accomplished. Deciding that I would post on this blog everyday, while not a bad idea at all, should have waited until after finals are over.

OH WELL

No one reads this, so it's completely all right to make terrible posts for the next week. I might make an actual blog post on Thursday!

Hype, hype.

It has come to my attention that

It has come to my attention that I can follow my own blog. And that I have a grand total of one view. From Alaska. Before I even made the first post with actual content in it.

I have a dilemma right now. I'm feeling extremely lazy, and I don't want to study for finals. Hmmm what do what do.

Thank goodness no one reads my blog, this post is terrible.

All right, I suppose I should start now...

Well hey! Guess what, I've decided to start blogging, and update at least every single day. Everyday? Yeah, that shouldn't be too hard since I can just come up with whatever I want in a minute or so. This blog is for whatever I want to say.
It will be like my own personal diary! Uploaded publicly on the internet for all to see. I never understood the point of writing in a diary if it's supposed to be private. I guess some people feel better about themselves when they write about their secrets. I don't really have any secrets so it doesn't matter.

SPEAKING OF SECRETS!

I have a few secrets I want to talk about. Get them off of my chest you know? Where to start where to start...

Let's start with my day today. There's this person who's been sitting in front of me in math class. He's a cool guy and all, but...he wears a top hat.
Now I love top hats and their fanciness, but it's obscuring my view of the white board. Granted, I don't pay attention during math class, but I'd like to have the option to pay attention, then choose not to. I don't want to be forced not to pay attention. Because I won't feel like a daring rebel anymore.

So with every passing day my distaste for top hats increases, but at the same time, what's a gentlemen without his top hat? I admit to wearing one in class too, but really now, I was wearing a top hat before the guy sitting in front of me ever even considered wearing one! Mimicry is the highest form of flattery, but this dude in front of me in math class is just plain ugly.

All right I'm done with my secret: that I vaguely dislike top hats but I really like them. I'm glad I finally got that off of my conscious.
Of course, by confessing my secrets and sins on the internet via buh-log probably makes my (non-existing) audience think I'm joking. Which is my intent all along! My mind is clear now that I finally revealed my inner thoughts, but no one will think poorly of me because they'll think I'm joking! And now that I revealed that I'm actually telling the truth and that I want people to think I'm joking, people will begin to doubt whether or not I'm really joking, telling the truth, or just messing with their minds.
I'll progressively start posting more and more dark secrets, until the one day I'll reveal that it was I that killed my father back during the Cold War! And even though I confessed the truth, everyone will too busy trying to figure out whether or not I'm joking to throw me in jail! A genius plan I say, genius!
Why would I even bother revealing such a fact? Well to be honest, I do feel really guilty about it. Telling someone else would make me feel better.

That, or I'm messing with you, even I don't honestly know.